An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh. --Will Rogers
Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses. --Margaret Millar
It is equally offensive to speed a guest who would like to stay and to detain one who is anxious to leave. --Homer
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt, quoted Kansas City Star, June 5, 1977
A minute's success pays the failure of years. --Robert Browning
The great thing in this world is not so much where you stand, as in what direction you are moving. --Oliver Wendell Holmes
Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any one thing. --Abraham Lincoln
Nothing fails like success. --Gerald Nachman
The moment of victory is much too short to live for that and nothing else. --Martina Navratilova
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half. --Gracie Allen
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